The dream that most of us have is to build a beautiful partnership with our horses where we can work together as one. We can dance with ease. We can walk side-by-side in harmony. We can interact with joy, playfulness, and respect. That love and connection we hunger for with our horses reflects the love that we crave in life.
The connection and bond that we would like to build comes from the heart. Blending your heart energy with that of your horse’s is one of the most delicious experiences that you can have in life. However, focusing solely on a heart connection can leave the relationship out of balance. As beautiful as love and unity are, we are working with large animals.
Empowered partnership with your horse means that you focus on love and connection (the 4th chakra) along with personal power (the 3rd chakra). What happens if you forget the empowerment aspect of partnership is three-fold.
The horse is disempowered – if the horse is not encouraged to activate his sense of power and free will, then he loses his authentic voice in your relationship. Your horse needs to be himself. He needs to be able to attend to his own needs and act as an empowered being who can choose what is best for himself.
Of course, many riders are happy to take this sense of empowerment away so that the horse is easier to handle and ride. In fact, when we ride, we sit on the third chakra. However, when we take away their choice and power as a sentient being, we are undermining the relationship. We cannot love another fully while asking them to be something other than who they truly are.
The human is disempowered – if your heart is not rooted in a sense of power, then your horse can begin to overpower you, which can be dangerous. You must learn how to send boundaries, stand your ground, and speak your truth in the presence of the horse. You can learn to hold your ground without losing your temper.
One of the greatest skills horses can teach you is how to be lovingly assertive. Sometimes we think that love must be nice or gentle – not true! While love is never abusive, it can certainly be firm, honest, and powerful. You must learn how to call up the full power of you are to stand as an equal in your horse’s eyes and be trustworthy and strong.
The disempowered relationship – if neither of you are seated in your personal power, then the whole relationship is out of balance. This can easily turn into a situation where either horse or human becomes aggressive and acts out toward the other in an act of false power. Without authentic power, or clear boundaries, someone must step up and be the boss. Even with a heart connection, there will be a power struggle.
While you can show up on equal footing in partnership, when both partners are not standing strong in the truth and wisdom of who they are, it becomes impossible to have a fulfilling relationship. The love connection is built on insecurity and uncertainty which will continually damage the trust and respect that you are trying to build.
Love alone is not enough if you want an empowered partnership. You may be wondering how you can empower your horse without being taken advantage of. The answer is, by empowering yourself at the same time! Come into balance with your horse and encourage all parties to show up in the fullness of who they are. Without that, there is power over rather than power with.
To help you start to work with your horse in empowered partnership, you can begin to visualize an energetic connection between you. To begin, you need to understand the placement of the chakras. On your body, the third chakra is in your solar plexus running along the midline of your body just below your ribs. The fourth chakra is in the center of your chest. The horse’s third chakra is midway down the back – just under where you would sit to ride. The heart chakra is in the center of their chest behind the shoulder.
As you connect or play with your horse, picture the flow of energy running between you and your horse. You may visualize it as a golden light. That energy, or light, is going to run from your horse’s heart to your solar plexus and from your heart to your horse’s solar plexus. I like to connect the ends so that you have a figure eight pattern. Horse heart to human plexus to human heart and back to horse plexus to horse heart and around it goes again.
The reason I like to connect this way instead of making a box – heart to heart and plexus to plexus – is to create balance and respect in the flow of energy. This way there is no power struggle. Your love and connection is tied into the full power of each individual.
You can now play with the energy. Picture drawing your horse in from their power center to your heart. Then push them away from your power center to their heart center. After you have tried that, change the energy flow to pull them in from their heart to your power center. Then push them from your heart to their power center.
What feels best to you?
I like to pull their power into my heart to draw a horse closer to me. I activate that energy chain so that I am receiving the fullness of their power into my heart. Then I complete the figure eight by asking them to love and respect my power as they come near so as not to overpower me.
Then I reverse the flow to push them out. I lovingly activate their power center encouraging them to take action and move away from me. That comes from my heart to stay in connection. I complete the figure eight by asking that they stay tuned in with their heart by loving and respecting the strength of who I am.
In this way, you are loving the wholeness of your horse and empowering him. The love you receive serves to empower you. Sharing your power and being assertive is an act of love and a gift – the same is true for the horse.
This pulling and sending is the base for any lunging or free luging work that you do. Remember to activate your first and second chakras to stay grounded as you play with the energy between you and your horse. The more grounded you are, the safer your horse will feel in your presence. He will start to seek out your company.